THE STALKER’S GUIDE TO JUSTIN BIEBER’S INDIA TOUR (YOU’RE WELCOME)
This pop sensation is going to be in India for FIVE days. If you're really lucky, you'll spot him on the street or at a popular bar. But keep this stalker's guide handy, just in case.
mm
03 May 2017

JUST ONE WEEK TO GO, CAN YOU BELIEBE IT?

 

Yes, the time has come. In just a few days, this Canadian superstar (and his mom) finally hit Maximum City, turning up the heat on an already-scorching Indian summer. That he’s going to immediately take off again in his private jet to streak through the Golden Triangle (Delhi-Agra-Jaipur) is not the point. The point is that you can follow him. From a legally-acceptable distance. Because we’ve got all the dope on his itinerary; we know where he’s gonna be, who he might visit, even which roads he may be on. We’ve created the perfect print + fold BIEBER TRACKER for fan boys and girls in India, with hyperlinks within this story FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE. You can thank us for our amaze sleuthing skills later (we accept cash).

 

 

Ok, first some basics: Biebs is going to fly in from Dubai (after his World Purpose concert there) on 7 May, a few days prior to his Mumbai extravabonanza on 10 May. So he’ll be here five days, total. We heard sometime last month that actress Jaqueline Fernandez was going to play host, taking him all over the city in an auto rickshaw. (But that’s also when Sonakshi Sinha was still the opening act for this fairly unpredictable pop sensation, and then there was this whole thing on Twitter with one of the singer/composer Malik bros., and now she’s not. Or something. Who can even keep up anymore?) Still, since we’re covering all bases, on her list of experiences she has planned for JB is the ISKCON temple, Dharavi (sigh, of course), and Colaba Causeway.

 

Day 1: Bieber goes on and on about how much he loves Indian food. So we’re giving him some. From each state of the country. On the menu is a bunch of top thaalis (which themselves are gold, and silver, and engraved with JB & Co.’s names in Devanagari script), holding Maharaja-style meals. Hopefully, he can handle the spice. As for you, dear fan/stalker/reader, stay down. Let him settle in.

 

Day 2: Mumbai darshan! Because culture is about more than food. To give Bieber a taste of heritage and history, he’s being shown The Gateway of India, Kala Ghoda, and Mani Bhavan. Staying true to the name and the intentions of the Purpose Tour, he’s also being taken to what newspapers are insisting on calling an “underprivileged home”. Take your binoculars and walking shoes. This is also when the Purpose sound check and rehearsal is scheduled for today, though whether Biebs himself is gonna show up is still not confirmed.

 

Day 3: JUSTIIIIIIN, JUST-IN… *clap clap clap*! This is where you’ll DEFINITELY see him. At DY Patil Stadium. Because, you know, that’s where the actual concert is. He’s gonna fly in from Mahalaxmi Racecourse on a chopper. Try not to faint with excitement, because you’ll need to keep your ears open for the deets on the much-touted after party on a yacht. Someone said something about karaoke at this party, but that just sounds so highly avoidable, we’re going to pretend that Someone was lying.

 

Day 4 & 5: The fourth and fifth days sees Bieber fly down to New Delhi and Jaipur with a definite visit to Taj Mahal. It’s like 500 degrees out, so if you’re planning on camping out thereabouts, take a tanker of water.

 

(That’s all we have for now, but watch this space for updates.)

 

May the Purpose World Tour give you some purpose. Think of this like a five-day treasure hunt. Or, since it’s 2017, a special edition Pokémon Go bonus level, where a really rare catch is your eenie meenie miney mo lover. Get out of your house, on to the streets, and start hunting!

COMMENTS